Veteran’s Day is tomorrow (probably today by the time you’re reading this) and people are making a pretty big deal out of it. Speaking as a veteran, that’s kind of a pleasant surprise. It wasn’t that long ago that no one noticed Veteran’s Day at all, unless it was to express some irritation that the mail didn’t run and the bank was closed. The 9/11 attacks and ongoing wars in Iraq and Afghanistan have changed that quite a bit, and on the whole I think that’s a positive change.

Just for the record (because a lot of people get them confused) Memorial Day is when we honor those who died in service. Veteran’s Day is when we honor those who didn’t.

Also for the record, I’d like to point out that my only pet peeve about Veteran’s Day is that veterans (unless they work for the post office or a bank) don’t get the day off. Of course, whenever I say that people immediately assume I’m only advocating it because I’m a veteran and I’d like another paid holiday. Which is completely true, although I like to think I’d support the idea even if I wasn’t a veteran.

It’s become almost traditional now for people to take a moment on Veteran’s Day to say “Thank you for your service” to a veteran – usually a relative or someone they know at work. It’s a cool idea, and there’s no doubt that veterans appreciate the sentiment, but I’m going to be honest and say I never know exactly how to react when people say that to me.

See, when I look back on my military service, I’ve come to think about it as my way of saying “Thank you” to my country – so being thanked for saying thank you, obviously seems a little awkward.

Here’s the best way I can explain it: Travel around the world a little bit, and unless you’re some kind of self-loathing hippie moron, two things become apparent pretty quickly.
1. Most of the world is a miserable, squalid shithole.
2. The fact that America is not a shithole is no accident.

Now don’t get your panties in a wad. I’m not saying the US is a heaven on Earth or anything, but let’s be blunt here, OK? In most of the world, poverty means living in a mud hut, malnourished and drinking filthy water. In the US, poverty means you have to put up with a crappy cell phone, dial-up internet access, and no premium channels on your cable TV package.

I don’t think the US got that way because of divine providence, or abundant natural resources, and we’re sure as hell not smarter than anybody else. I think America is a non-shithole primarily because a lot of people worked their asses off to make it that way, and a lot of other people put their asses on the line to keep it that way. When my turn rolled around and I raised my right hand and took an oath to do my bit, it was just my way of saying “Thank you for the fact that I don’t have to live in a shithole.”

You want my advice? If you want to thank a veteran tomorrow, don’t say “Thank you for your service.” I don’t think most veterans want your gratitude. In fact, most veterans I know take the position “Hell, I was getting paid.” I think what they really want is to know that they made you proud.

And when you get right down to it, if you’re an American you should be proud of them. At least since the halfway point of World War 2, your country has produced the single most dominant bunch of ass-kickers the world has ever known. Sure, our military has gotten bogged down sometimes, and lord knows it’s been badly managed sometimes, but the fact remains that no one on the planet has been able to stand up to your military in a straight-up fight for 60 years.

All the slogans about supporting our troops, yellow stickers on your car, that sort of thing, are all important symbols and I’m not knocking them, but I think they fail to take into account the pride we have in just how badass our troops really are. See what I mean by that? I support kids who participate in the Special Olympics. I’m proud of our military.

So tomorrow, instead of saying “Thank you for your service”, try asking that veteran at work what they did in the military. Try coaxing an old war story or two out of them. The odds are good you won’t have to try all that hard, trust me. Tell him (or her) how proud you are to have such a bunch of professional badasses representing your country, and tell him how cool you think it is that he (or she) helped contribute to that.

- Ken